GOSSIP GIRL
YOUR ONE AND ONLY SOURCE INTO THE SCANDALOUS LIVES OF MANHATTAN'S ELITE |
Spotted: two love birds entering a plane
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Worst Performance: Nicholas Sterling
Other than first names, there is one thing Sterling and the character of Bottom share in common: they're both shockingly awful actors and, quite frankly, they both just hit rock bottom in their acting careers. Only difference being that Nick Bottom never attempted a singing audition while high on weed — as for Nick, let's just say those green herbs don't do his vocals any favours... Money-Can't-Buy-Everything Award: Leah Patterson In the words of Amber: “I’m sorry, am I judging a second grade beauty pageant? Wait, no, because if I was it would be better than the disgrace you just auditioned with." Better luck next time, L? Your performance did seem a bit bland. Zero-Talent Award: Mackenzie Amstel If you're not used to being the centre of attention, it's easy to crumble under the eagle-eyed scrutiny of someone like Amber Fantasia. And although Kenzie's not exactly someone who sounds like a broken radio, she sure sounded like one today. I can't entirely blame the girl though: some people just aren't born with star quality we're looking for. At-Least-You're-Pretty-Award: Alison Porter No one ever got anywhere by being ugly. Beauty is a skill in itself, and Alison Porter excels in it. Sure she may have the acting ability of a kindergartener, but when you're that pretty, does it even matter? |
Best Performance: Amber Fantasia
Mainly for being a biatch to everyone. I mean, staying in character through thick and thin isn't as easy as it's cracked out to be, especially when it's some cringe-worthy performances you're judging. Amber Fantasia has an eye for scrutiny, and there's no denying that. Most Likely to Win the Oscars: Elizabeth Telldorn She's new and she's already taken the stage by storm. If she's this fast at conquering the auditorium, just how long until she conquers the Hollywood Hall of Fame? You better start running laps around her, or at least get her autograph while you have the chance; this one doesn't mess around. Most Likely to Win the Grammys: Alyson Bell While usually the honour is reserved for Nicholas Sterling, it looks like this time he was swiftly outcompeted by none other than Alyson Bell herself. I've got to say, this girl has talent. You've got a new fan in me, A. Keeping-Up-With-the-Porters Award: Alison Porter While we're on the subject though, if anyone deserves two awards, it's Alison Porter. Darling, acting isn’t in your strong suit. If you ask me, you may want to pull a Kardashian and release a sex tape because reality TV is the only way that career will pull off. And that's exactly why I've decided to give you a Keeping-Up-With-the-Porters Award as a bonus. |
And lastly, the most important award... the Keeping-It-Real Award, because let’s be honest, if anyone should get an award, it should of course be moi.
...After all, it takes talent to write about the likes of the upper classes.
You know you love me.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
...After all, it takes talent to write about the likes of the upper classes.
You know you love me.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
weird text alert
january
April Fool's Day comes once a year, but some people are eager to get ahead of the game — and it looks like Party Boy Sterling may be one of those people:
There's nothing like a prank text to lighten your spirits two weeks into the term... And I always like to think that pranking exposes the truth that underneath this appearance of order is joy, laughter, and disorder.
Question is, which of the responses is your favourite?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Question is, which of the responses is your favourite?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Expect the Unexpected
january
They say to expect the unexpected, but I find it's often easier said than done.
According to my sources, Jay Yeong was last seen leaving junior class with a bloody nose. And the person behind it? None other than Mason Oliver, who was swiftly sent to the Principal's office following the ordeal. What makes this all the more mysterious is that (to quote my source) "everything was fine and then Mason just totes came out of nowhere throwing a sucker-punch at him". But to cut a long story short, karma came to even the score, so I can tell you for a fact that Jay may not be the only one with a sore face around.
Trading punches that early in the day though: it's a bold move from M, and it looks like someone has discovered a newfound fascination for skating on thin ice. Though, if you ask me, nobody ventures into the lion's den with a death wish in mind. Could Mason really have gone loco... or is it something more?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
According to my sources, Jay Yeong was last seen leaving junior class with a bloody nose. And the person behind it? None other than Mason Oliver, who was swiftly sent to the Principal's office following the ordeal. What makes this all the more mysterious is that (to quote my source) "everything was fine and then Mason just totes came out of nowhere throwing a sucker-punch at him". But to cut a long story short, karma came to even the score, so I can tell you for a fact that Jay may not be the only one with a sore face around.
Trading punches that early in the day though: it's a bold move from M, and it looks like someone has discovered a newfound fascination for skating on thin ice. Though, if you ask me, nobody ventures into the lion's den with a death wish in mind. Could Mason really have gone loco... or is it something more?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
on the a-list
january
If there's one thing we all know, it's that you're never truly on the A-list until you're talked about. And that's how we all know that aspiring singer and our all-time favourite party boy, Nicholas Sterling, just made it big... let's just hope his singing career takes off as well as his reputation for drama and scandal.
Here's the scoop on what I've received about him today alone:
...Looks like someone has some devoted fans.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Here's the scoop on what I've received about him today alone:
- Spotted: Prince Charming leaving the ball only to be found in locked lips with Jezebel Luna. I’m all for the on-again, off-again relationship status N and J have but it’s seriously becoming overrated. A bit of advice: pick one and stick with it. You wouldn’t want to become irrelevant.
- Anyone else noticed Nick's strange behavior? Well, I just found the answer to all of our questions. If you want an eventful day, just get dear ol' Nicholas high as a kite. Where is Dean Weston again? I have a feeling he wouldn't like this very much.
- Weird Text Alert: Seems like Nick's case of the munchies has also caused another outbreak. Anyone received a strange text lately?
...Looks like someone has some devoted fans.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
put on your dancing shoes
january
Estelle Macmillan and resident party boy Nicholas Sterling sure had a memorable moment today...
Spotted swept away in each other's arms without a care in the world, the question now playing on everyone's mind after today's fiasco: could it really be the beginning of a budding romance? While that may be the case, there's no denying Nick has to up his game if he's thinking of capturing the heart of the blonde beauty in question: because it's one thing to sweep a girl off her feet, but it's another to sing in her ear like a screeching cat.
That being said, I hear the teacher for senior class wasn't too impressed by the whole performance – and I imagine the rest of Nick's lovers wouldn't be either...
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Spotted swept away in each other's arms without a care in the world, the question now playing on everyone's mind after today's fiasco: could it really be the beginning of a budding romance? While that may be the case, there's no denying Nick has to up his game if he's thinking of capturing the heart of the blonde beauty in question: because it's one thing to sweep a girl off her feet, but it's another to sing in her ear like a screeching cat.
That being said, I hear the teacher for senior class wasn't too impressed by the whole performance – and I imagine the rest of Nick's lovers wouldn't be either...
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
once upon a time
january
While we may have all grown up believing everyone grows up to get their happily-ever after, some fairytales just don't have the endings we're hoping for. Once in a while, in an ordinary life, love gives us the fairytale we're desperately seeking to have. Unfortunately, every fairytale has to come to an end, and I hear that the particular fairytale in question is Jezebel Luna and Nicholas Sterling, because sources tell me that J found herself in bed with a stranger for the first time since separating from her ex-beau.
Jezebel had her first fling ever since her break up with Nicholas and now it turns out she has a twin brother?!
When one fairytale ends, another begins. In this case, the one that begins is the fairytale of two long-lost siblings eventually reunited. Grab a tissue you all, this one is a tale for the ages...
I just overheard Jezebel Luna in a conversation with Jasper Sevroy and some new boy who just, I s*** you not, just said he was Jezebel's twin brother or something?! As if her family couldn't get any stranger! It's honestly so shocking, but that's exactly why it makes for some good gossip! So Jez, honey, I hope you don't have some psychopathic cousin or evil stepmother hiding out there somewhere.
I don't know about you, but I'm a sucker for fairytales, so here's hoping this one doesn't feature an evil witch...
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Jezebel had her first fling ever since her break up with Nicholas and now it turns out she has a twin brother?!
When one fairytale ends, another begins. In this case, the one that begins is the fairytale of two long-lost siblings eventually reunited. Grab a tissue you all, this one is a tale for the ages...
I just overheard Jezebel Luna in a conversation with Jasper Sevroy and some new boy who just, I s*** you not, just said he was Jezebel's twin brother or something?! As if her family couldn't get any stranger! It's honestly so shocking, but that's exactly why it makes for some good gossip! So Jez, honey, I hope you don't have some psychopathic cousin or evil stepmother hiding out there somewhere.
I don't know about you, but I'm a sucker for fairytales, so here's hoping this one doesn't feature an evil witch...
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
SPOTTED: WILLIAM AND JOSSLYN
january
Looks like a familiar face is back under the radar with this latest scoop:
Hey, Gossip Girl, I didn't think you would have caught this scoop before I did. I heard, and even spotted, William Alexander Parker with Josslyn De Loughrey, holding hands, kissing each other, and ditching school just to head over to the cafe. Take it from me, looks like we may just have a new couple, and William has stooped waaaaaaaaaaay down low, for a new girl.
While it's easy to mistake Josslyn De Loughrey for fresh meat considering she's been MIA for most of sophomore year, something tells me we'll be seeing a lot more of the De Loughreys around now that she's back.
Look out Upper-East Siders, this one's one to watch out for.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Hey, Gossip Girl, I didn't think you would have caught this scoop before I did. I heard, and even spotted, William Alexander Parker with Josslyn De Loughrey, holding hands, kissing each other, and ditching school just to head over to the cafe. Take it from me, looks like we may just have a new couple, and William has stooped waaaaaaaaaaay down low, for a new girl.
While it's easy to mistake Josslyn De Loughrey for fresh meat considering she's been MIA for most of sophomore year, something tells me we'll be seeing a lot more of the De Loughreys around now that she's back.
Look out Upper-East Siders, this one's one to watch out for.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
DRAMA QUEEN alert
january
Drama Queen is at it again... no wonder she signed up as an actress for the new school play:
Gossip Girl, oh, Gossip Girl! You should have seen the scene between Harper Elizabeth Meyer and Jordin Marrow. I heard they've known each other since they were tiny, little kids. Just heard that a scene happened between the gossip you posted. Seems like Leo just left poor little Jordin after they kissed... maybe she was a toy for him? I'm not sure. Take it from me, Harper seems to have my support on the situation, I mean, Harper probably had way better things to do then to hear Jordin rant about her love life, besides, Harper is the child of one of the world's most prized designers, and she has the style of a freaking boss, and is way prettier, so, how about you Gossip Girl?
I'm #TeamHarper all the way, lovelies.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Gossip Girl, oh, Gossip Girl! You should have seen the scene between Harper Elizabeth Meyer and Jordin Marrow. I heard they've known each other since they were tiny, little kids. Just heard that a scene happened between the gossip you posted. Seems like Leo just left poor little Jordin after they kissed... maybe she was a toy for him? I'm not sure. Take it from me, Harper seems to have my support on the situation, I mean, Harper probably had way better things to do then to hear Jordin rant about her love life, besides, Harper is the child of one of the world's most prized designers, and she has the style of a freaking boss, and is way prettier, so, how about you Gossip Girl?
I'm #TeamHarper all the way, lovelies.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
it's all fun and games
january
Word is, little Miss Ophelia Clarke has been having fun around the Upper East Side. It's the middle of the winter, and she's in the middle of a romantic rendezvous with none other than Nicholas Sterling himself:
I saw a certain Sterling with Ophelia Clarke. And I don’t mean Alex, I mean Nick. Isn’t he already getting it down with Alison Porter, or did that end? It looks like he’s recently been hanging out Ophelia. They’ve been engaging in romantic activities, she should learn to wipe off the makeup before making out with a male.
Take a life lesson from me when I say the lipstick nearly always gives it away... Now that's going to make for one unhappy line of lovers.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
I saw a certain Sterling with Ophelia Clarke. And I don’t mean Alex, I mean Nick. Isn’t he already getting it down with Alison Porter, or did that end? It looks like he’s recently been hanging out Ophelia. They’ve been engaging in romantic activities, she should learn to wipe off the makeup before making out with a male.
Take a life lesson from me when I say the lipstick nearly always gives it away... Now that's going to make for one unhappy line of lovers.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
velaterapia...so last year...
january
I spy with my little eye something beginning with I-just-saw-some-girl-try-to-burn-William-Alexander's-hair in my submissions box. Read what my source says for yourself:
Hey Gossip Girl, I don't know if you care or not, but I just saw some girl try to burn William Alexander's hair. Like, I legit saw her take out a lighter, and then put it on William's hair. He freaked the fuck out! But seriously though, GG, is that not crazy? That girl, I think I've seen her around once too, her name's Juliet, I think. P.S. by the way, don't quote me on this, cause I'm starting to feel kinda high right now. Pot and coffee in the morning make for one magical combination, you should try it.
While we folks on the Upper East Side appreciate keeping up with the latest trends, it's too bad velaterapia doesn't quite make the list, because last I checked, that is so last year. And when I say last year, I mean four years ago...
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Hey Gossip Girl, I don't know if you care or not, but I just saw some girl try to burn William Alexander's hair. Like, I legit saw her take out a lighter, and then put it on William's hair. He freaked the fuck out! But seriously though, GG, is that not crazy? That girl, I think I've seen her around once too, her name's Juliet, I think. P.S. by the way, don't quote me on this, cause I'm starting to feel kinda high right now. Pot and coffee in the morning make for one magical combination, you should try it.
While we folks on the Upper East Side appreciate keeping up with the latest trends, it's too bad velaterapia doesn't quite make the list, because last I checked, that is so last year. And when I say last year, I mean four years ago...
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
spotted: leo and jordin
january
Spotted: Leo and Jordin sharing a passionate kiss at the infirmary, a little out of place considering his sister, Leah, had just passed out from... depression? Seems like the nurse didn't want to disclose the real reason behind Leah's collapse. One may pass out for many reasons – depression isn't of them. My diagnosis? Leah is a pathological liar, she faked the whole incident for some attention – after all, the new girls are often the most desperate. Get well soon, Leah, you'll need the energy to survive in the Upper East Side. Oh– and welcome to Constance.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
update #bdaybash
january
Long live the Queen. Amidst the scandal and the slap to the face of Maximus McNamara, not to mention Sevroy's impromptu diving with strangers, it breaks my heart to bring you news that the newly-crowned Queen of the Hot or Not list has been involved in a minor car accident alongside her pauper Edison Montgomery. I always tell them to choose the prince over the pauper, though I guess royalty has a knack for falling head over heels for the frog.
Meanwhile, it seems friendship between the two As took a one-way road to the police station after the two of them were kicked out off the party by none other than Party Boy himself. Shortly after leaving the party scene red-faced and disgraced, I hear the two of them decided to air their dirty laundry outside, only to end up in the back of a cop car. A word of advice: if I were you, I'd focus on airing your hair out instead, I mean, all that chlorine couldn't have done your locks any justice. Perhaps that visit to the police station will? We have our fingers crossed.
We here at the Upper East Side are a welcoming bunch, and it seems like Nick Sterling himself didn't manage to do our reputation any justice either with the way I spied a mystery girl kicked out of the party alongside the two As. Don't you know that's not the way you treat your guests? Perhaps you should convince that #BadBoyBell friend of yours to fund some Hospitality 101 courses at Constance to bring your A-game up to scratch, because as the host of the Sterling Birthday Bash, we could all expect better.
Speaking of, I've heard he couldn't even be bothered to mingle with the guests, let alone his friends. I guess I could let you know that Watson and McNamara have been looking for you all evening, but I think we all know that certain friend of yours who's been preoccupying your time, or your bed. Well, what can I say, with my years of experience observing the lot of you, I could do with publishing a thesis on the oh-so-splendid phenomenon of sleeping with your best friend's friend with benefit, or whatever you'd call the relationship between Bell and Baby Bell.
We're all hoping for your recovery, Queen K.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Meanwhile, it seems friendship between the two As took a one-way road to the police station after the two of them were kicked out off the party by none other than Party Boy himself. Shortly after leaving the party scene red-faced and disgraced, I hear the two of them decided to air their dirty laundry outside, only to end up in the back of a cop car. A word of advice: if I were you, I'd focus on airing your hair out instead, I mean, all that chlorine couldn't have done your locks any justice. Perhaps that visit to the police station will? We have our fingers crossed.
We here at the Upper East Side are a welcoming bunch, and it seems like Nick Sterling himself didn't manage to do our reputation any justice either with the way I spied a mystery girl kicked out of the party alongside the two As. Don't you know that's not the way you treat your guests? Perhaps you should convince that #BadBoyBell friend of yours to fund some Hospitality 101 courses at Constance to bring your A-game up to scratch, because as the host of the Sterling Birthday Bash, we could all expect better.
Speaking of, I've heard he couldn't even be bothered to mingle with the guests, let alone his friends. I guess I could let you know that Watson and McNamara have been looking for you all evening, but I think we all know that certain friend of yours who's been preoccupying your time, or your bed. Well, what can I say, with my years of experience observing the lot of you, I could do with publishing a thesis on the oh-so-splendid phenomenon of sleeping with your best friend's friend with benefit, or whatever you'd call the relationship between Bell and Baby Bell.
We're all hoping for your recovery, Queen K.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
spotted: aly and birthday boy#bdaybash
january
Spotted: Nick and Aly sharing an intimate exchange. Seems Nick is upset, and of course Alyson jumps straight to the rescue because she simply has to be Miss Perfect – right? Wrong! Baby Bell may act all alternative as though she doesn't care what other people think of her, and I don't know about you, but it didn't exactly seem that way when Alyson Bell was throwing up every meal in a desperate attempt to get people to like her. Word on the street is, that's what Alyson Bell is: desperate.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
i hate you i love you
january
Speaking of romances, I've been reminded of an interesting submission I received earlier today from a loyal devotee of mine, and you're in for a shocker with this one...
Oh, Gossip Girl, if only you were in my shoes right now. I'm sure you will wish you were when I tell you what I just heard. People say the ongoing feud between Bellamy and Alison is one for the history books. I mean, just take a look at the past – we've all seen it. They HATE each other... Or do they? This just in from the eyes and ears of moi: Alison and Bell are having a secret affair amidst all the hate. Perhaps it's a fetish of theirs - to pretend they hate each other when in actuality it turns them on. I don't know exactly when it started, but I do know what I've seen. If you don't believe me, just send one of your star reporters to the Porter residence and you'll catch the one and only Bellamy Watson leaving with a "cocky" grin on his face. Pun intended.
Sure enough, I did catch the one and the only Bell leaving, not so much with a "cocky" grin on his face like my source suggested though.
Lovers' troubles, perhaps?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Oh, Gossip Girl, if only you were in my shoes right now. I'm sure you will wish you were when I tell you what I just heard. People say the ongoing feud between Bellamy and Alison is one for the history books. I mean, just take a look at the past – we've all seen it. They HATE each other... Or do they? This just in from the eyes and ears of moi: Alison and Bell are having a secret affair amidst all the hate. Perhaps it's a fetish of theirs - to pretend they hate each other when in actuality it turns them on. I don't know exactly when it started, but I do know what I've seen. If you don't believe me, just send one of your star reporters to the Porter residence and you'll catch the one and only Bellamy Watson leaving with a "cocky" grin on his face. Pun intended.
Sure enough, I did catch the one and the only Bell leaving, not so much with a "cocky" grin on his face like my source suggested though.
Lovers' troubles, perhaps?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
romance and rivalries #BDAYBASH
january
The Sterling party is in full swing and we all know what a good party holds: romance (or lack thereof), and the budding rivalries a brew. Good thing is that this party has all three. Although I don't usually do trade requests in the form of Cartier handbags for gossip, I'll make an exception just this once, because what I have here for you is something good.
Check out this submission I just received:
Let’s start with my favorite: rivalries. I like to call it: Triple A Threat. We all know Alison Porter is one who brings trouble every where she goes and today is no different.
Case A: Darling A seems to be, as Amber said best, “fighting with the help.” That’s right, new kids beware, Alison’s on a warpath today and it includes devouring a very expensive bottle of Bordeaux. Sorry, Selena, guess you won’t be making a good impression on the Sterlings. After all, we all know how they love their alcohol… and I heard they don’t take too kindly to people who don’t bring them gifts.
Case A2: Amber Fantasia. Man, the things I could say about this girl, but why don’t I skip the pleasantries and get right to the good stuff – after all I do believe that’s Amber’s motto. It seems as well as following in her bestie's footsteps, she is as well stirring up trouble with Jasper “whatever-his-lastname-is.” I see a fun little rivalry between the two – don’t you? After all, it’s not everyone that you drop a full bottle of rosé upon.
Case A3 (and I’ve saved the best for last): Alexandra Sterling. I was getting quite bored watching this one. I was promised party girl for the stars and what I got was a mopey princess taking strolls on the beach. I’m glad I didn’t give up, because just in time, I got to witness the confrontation between one Alex and Jezebel Luna, and damn, was it a good one. Nick, darling, perhaps you should watch the girls in your life more closely, then again, you were a bit busy with one of your own… weren’t you?
And that moves me on to romances: Let’s start with the birthday boy. Seems as if he’s been having quite a bit of fun. First with Alison a few weeks earlier and next with her best friend Emery inside the privacy of his room. Then again, privacy is overrated which is why I feel no shame telling you that Em and Nick weren’t just talking about the past in that room, they were reliving the best parts of it… if you get my gist. It seems as if friends do everything in twos however, Bell was getting his fair share of fun as well with Baby Bell. I thought they were a one-time thing but, seeing them splashing around, it seems as if they're maybe a little bit more.
Hope you enjoy the gossip and I’ll keep my eyes open for anything else, sweets.
Count me impressed – and expect those Cartiers to be heading your way, my secret source... Maybe that'll be an incentive for the rest of you to up your game, because I know we all won't mind a few gifts of appreciation popping up in the mail any time soon.
But for now, enjoy the party!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Check out this submission I just received:
Let’s start with my favorite: rivalries. I like to call it: Triple A Threat. We all know Alison Porter is one who brings trouble every where she goes and today is no different.
Case A: Darling A seems to be, as Amber said best, “fighting with the help.” That’s right, new kids beware, Alison’s on a warpath today and it includes devouring a very expensive bottle of Bordeaux. Sorry, Selena, guess you won’t be making a good impression on the Sterlings. After all, we all know how they love their alcohol… and I heard they don’t take too kindly to people who don’t bring them gifts.
Case A2: Amber Fantasia. Man, the things I could say about this girl, but why don’t I skip the pleasantries and get right to the good stuff – after all I do believe that’s Amber’s motto. It seems as well as following in her bestie's footsteps, she is as well stirring up trouble with Jasper “whatever-his-lastname-is.” I see a fun little rivalry between the two – don’t you? After all, it’s not everyone that you drop a full bottle of rosé upon.
Case A3 (and I’ve saved the best for last): Alexandra Sterling. I was getting quite bored watching this one. I was promised party girl for the stars and what I got was a mopey princess taking strolls on the beach. I’m glad I didn’t give up, because just in time, I got to witness the confrontation between one Alex and Jezebel Luna, and damn, was it a good one. Nick, darling, perhaps you should watch the girls in your life more closely, then again, you were a bit busy with one of your own… weren’t you?
And that moves me on to romances: Let’s start with the birthday boy. Seems as if he’s been having quite a bit of fun. First with Alison a few weeks earlier and next with her best friend Emery inside the privacy of his room. Then again, privacy is overrated which is why I feel no shame telling you that Em and Nick weren’t just talking about the past in that room, they were reliving the best parts of it… if you get my gist. It seems as if friends do everything in twos however, Bell was getting his fair share of fun as well with Baby Bell. I thought they were a one-time thing but, seeing them splashing around, it seems as if they're maybe a little bit more.
Hope you enjoy the gossip and I’ll keep my eyes open for anything else, sweets.
Count me impressed – and expect those Cartiers to be heading your way, my secret source... Maybe that'll be an incentive for the rest of you to up your game, because I know we all won't mind a few gifts of appreciation popping up in the mail any time soon.
But for now, enjoy the party!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
i'm back bitches #BDAYBASH
january
The night is young, but so is an all time favourite Sterling of ours, and when I say Sterling, I mean party girl Sterling. Careful there, A, we all know you can't escape the possibility of tomorrow by evading it today, although it's nice to see the Ostroff hasn't failed to quench your party spirit just yet. What's that, you ask? Need I say any more than "she's back, bitches"?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
a sterling invitation
january
Gossip Girl here, ready to relay some oh-so-awaited news, because there's nothing better than a Sterling invitation...
With this message, you have been cordially invited to the event of the century. That’s right you, out of all people, have been deemed important enough to come to the Sterling’s Annual Birthday Bash – an event second to only Coachella (though there are rumors that this event is better!).
Location: 503 E Boardwalk, Long Beach, NY 11561
What to Bring:
And what do Sterling parties and mass texts have in common... they're all a blast!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
With this message, you have been cordially invited to the event of the century. That’s right you, out of all people, have been deemed important enough to come to the Sterling’s Annual Birthday Bash – an event second to only Coachella (though there are rumors that this event is better!).
Location: 503 E Boardwalk, Long Beach, NY 11561
What to Bring:
- Presents (one for Alex and one for Nick obviously, p.s. better make it good or we have the right to kick you out!)
- A swimsuit, surfboard, other swimwear material etc.
- Old homework assignments – and even new ones if you're willing to get rid of them.
- And, of course, your beautiful selves.
And what do Sterling parties and mass texts have in common... they're all a blast!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
alarm bells start to ring
january
When alarm bells start to ring, you're looking at some advil and earmuffs. Take heed of my advice, Upper East Siders, Constance Billard has been hit by alarm bells, and I'm not talking fire alarms. A school-wide sobriety test has led to some several days worth of au revoirs, so I guess we won't be seeing a certain two Bells around until next Monday – way to leave the rest of us accounting for your mess.
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
ALISON PORTER MUST PIE
january
Alison Porter coated in Jell-O (courtesy of the other A) and laughing her heart out, as well as a whole magnitude of disorder and chaos in the dining hall of Constance Billard (yes, it does involve pie), as bananas, tuna sandwiches, and brownies fly right, left and centre. What's this, you may ask? Some might call this a fustercluck. But on the Upper East Side, we call it first day back at school. Better enjoy the moment while it lasts, after all, happiness is short-lived, and I can imagine you'll have a whole lot of spring cleaning to do once it's over.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
jimmy who's?
january
They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, so it comes as a relief to me to know all my hard work was for nothing, so much so that I hear New York Times guest professor and former Constance Billard alumni Sebastian Hanning is already taking a page from my book. Like Coco Chanel once said, "If you want to be original, be ready to be copied." And who better for you to take note from than the founder of the brand we all know and love in this modern day and age? I am simply honoured that you would look at me in such regard, though I must warn you, there's no one better than the original, because you know we'd all settle for the Jimmy Choos over the Jimmy Who's, given the chance.
Good luck, losers, maybe you'll learn to appreciate all the hard work I do.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Good luck, losers, maybe you'll learn to appreciate all the hard work I do.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
who's hot and who's not
january
On the Upper East Side, you may think that who your momma and pappa is determines a lot about your social success, but we all know that it's Gossip Girl who really does. It's finally the start of term, and what a better way to kick off January than with my annual Who's Hot and Who's Not list?
Well, here it is, the official HOT ranking of Constance Billard students:
Well, here it is, the official HOT ranking of Constance Billard students:
Girls: 1. Katherine Hart 2. Alison Porter 3. Rosalia de Luca 4. Han Meila 5. Alyson Bell |
Boys: 1. Bellamy Watson 2. Nicholas Sterling 3. Frederick Hampton 4. Maximus McNamara 5. Augustus Kaufman |
For those of you thinking I forgot about you, trust me, there was no mistake made on my part, and for those of you who made it, congratulations! You just made the most exclusive list of the year. Everyone on this list should be proud, but don’t let it get to your heads. I gave you this title and I can just as quickly take it away, after all, my word is law.
Just a word of advice to Emery Lockwood and Jessalyn McNamara, you aren't helping anyone with your desperation.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
alice in wonderland
january
I'm a firm believer that each and every one of us has a spirit food, kind of like a spirit animal, but, well, food (duh!) I know that I can name a few delicacies, though I'm a little stuck on Sage Cameron... bubble tea, anyone? We all know that Cameron's the living embodiment of Alice in Wonderland, I'll give you that. Rumour has it that our dear Sage has had a few too many trips down the rabbit-hole, and I'm talking narcotics. That's right: it appears Party Girl's not the only one who's taken a journey down to good ol' Wonderland. It seems it's pretty obvious why Bubble Tea used to hang out alongside Nicholas Sterling, I mean, surely you should be starting to connect the dots by now? On second thought, I guess cocaine could be her spirit food, if you class it as one. I mean, hey, look at the positive-- at least Alex stands a chance of getting some company, as I can imagine it must be getting pretty lonely at the Ostroff Centre by now...
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
you can run, but you can't hide
january
Sometimes we need to lose the small battles in order to win the war, and knowing Queen A, we know the coming war isn't going to be pretty. What's this you hear? Roll up, roll up, because there's a war brewing in the Upper East Side after a dispute turned ugly. It's the first day back to school and already all the fun has begun. With Queen A quite literally knocked flat and unconscious against a locker (have you seen the state of it now?) at the hands of Resident Nobody, the newly-famed Laurens was spotted fleeing the scene minutes later in the fear of getting caught red-handed – but we for one know that if you play with fire, you're going to get burned.
You can run, but you can't hide from the consequences of the match you lit, until you quench it.
Best keep your guard up, Laurens, you've picked your battle and now there's just only one thing left to do, and fight it.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
You can run, but you can't hide from the consequences of the match you lit, until you quench it.
Best keep your guard up, Laurens, you've picked your battle and now there's just only one thing left to do, and fight it.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
SPOTTED: GOLDEN BOY
january
Red has been a prevalent one on the color spectrum for me as of late, but it is just such an interesting colour to correlate with emotion, because it's on both ends of the spectrum. On one end you have happiness, falling in love, infatuation with someone, passion, and on the other end, you've got obsession, jealousy, danger, fear, anger and frustration. Speaking of red, have you seen how muscular golden boy has gotten over the holiday?! A little birdie tells me there's a little more behind the red-faced intensives he's been pulling around the clock since the end of last term, and I hear there's anger issues knocking on the door of none other than Frederick Hampton.
I don't know about you, but I feel that it's not a coincidence that another one in Party Boy's social circles is beginning to see red...
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
I don't know about you, but I feel that it's not a coincidence that another one in Party Boy's social circles is beginning to see red...
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
...RING A BELL?
january
We all know and love our favourite Party Boy, Nicholas Sterling, but do you remember resident Party Girl and twin sister to the infamous brother, Alexandra Sterling? Wonder what ever happened to her, oh wait I remember - a little vodka, some cocaine, and Party Boy's best friend Bell had a little something to do with her disappearance. That's right, I've found Party Girl's newest residence in the Ostroff Center, a mental facility for the rich and famous. Guess the Sterlings have more than a few skeletons in their closet. In any case, here's my advice to best friend Bell: maybe you should stay away from the women in Nick's life – first Alexandra and then you're seen leaving the New Year's Eve party with his ex beau Jezebel. We wouldn't want your perfect little face to have a bloody little nose again, and right after you made up with Nick, too!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
a first look at ridinghood
january
You're in for a treat, my fellow followers, because today our mysterious redhead emerges into the public eye, and this time, caught on camera just in time for the start of the term, courtesy of a very generous source of mine:
I've decided to help you out a little with your mysterious red-head. I'm giving you the first look. I'll admit, she may be my favorite red head yet. Not bad to look at. Now, let's find what she's hiding, because you know more than others that everyone has a secret – some more than others. And something tells me, this girl is hiding more than a few.
Welcome to Constance, Little Red Ridinghood, I'm sure you'll have the time of your life.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
I've decided to help you out a little with your mysterious red-head. I'm giving you the first look. I'll admit, she may be my favorite red head yet. Not bad to look at. Now, let's find what she's hiding, because you know more than others that everyone has a secret – some more than others. And something tells me, this girl is hiding more than a few.
Welcome to Constance, Little Red Ridinghood, I'm sure you'll have the time of your life.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Spotted: mackenzie amstel
january
Spotted: Mackenzie Amstel walking into into a foster home in the Lower East Side of town after the afterparty, and it looks like someone's not too keen on being seen in her party outfit, judging by the change of clothes. While she's taken the concept of rags to riches for a little spin tonight after being spotted leaving a Mercedes Benz just around the corner, we all know a leopard can't change its spots, and part of me is asking just how exactly it is that little Kenzie can afford the six figure tuition fees that separate the fab from the drab, but I'm guessing that's a story for another time...
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
turning heads at new years
january
There are two types of people in every situation: those who matter and those who don't. In the New Year's Party, which students stood out from the crowd?
Belle of the Ball | Best Entrance | Best Designer Label
Clad in head to toe Zuhair Murad, Rosalia de Luca certainly has been turning heads tonight as she stepped out of her limousine. . . . |
Best Dressed
It's dress to impress for Han Meila, dazzling as the epitome of elegance in her splendid white gown. |
Beau of the Ball | Best Cinderella
Once again the 'Bell' of the ball with his perfectly tailored tux despite a questionable absence of shoes... Life of the Party
Party Boy and Jessalyn McNamara. |
On a side note, I think if there's going to be a nomination for 'Best Quote', the honour is totally Alison's.
“Don’t get me wrong, you look gorgeous, but I’m pretty sure the dress code wasn’t slut.”
I'm glad someone mentioned it, I mean did you see what Emery Lockwood wore to the event? Even her BFF had something to say about it. It's a shame Ali wasn't around to pass some much-needed wisdom on to Amara, Sage, Alyson and Mackenzie though. I mean, it was supposed to be formal but they ended up looking trashier than ever.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
“Don’t get me wrong, you look gorgeous, but I’m pretty sure the dress code wasn’t slut.”
I'm glad someone mentioned it, I mean did you see what Emery Lockwood wore to the event? Even her BFF had something to say about it. It's a shame Ali wasn't around to pass some much-needed wisdom on to Amara, Sage, Alyson and Mackenzie though. I mean, it was supposed to be formal but they ended up looking trashier than ever.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
a midnight EXPOSé
january
Midnight came with a bang this year – or should I say last year, rather – but what is a new year complete without a new addition to welcome into the family? That's right, the McNamara household is set to be acquaintanced with a new bundle of joy this year, let's hope this one will live up to the name. Only, I hear not everyone in the family has been so welcoming to the news. One McNamara's nowhere to be seen, and the last recorded sighting of him was throwing a storm leaving the estate, closely followed at the heels by Plain Jane.
Sigh. Kenzie just can't catch a break... belittled by Rosalia, ignored by Max, and ditched by so-called friend, Jessalyn. Not the best way to end the year, but look on the bright side, at least she's not the only lonely loser at this affair (I heard Mike Laurens made an appearance, as well. So, if you were hoping for a post-midnight kiss, I'm sure Mikey would do, I wouldn't recommend setting your hopes too high on Max – and, anyways, we sure are surprised you didn't just go home, Special K™, it's obvious you don't belong in the UES party scene).
Oh, my mistake, looks like Laurens might not be available for you this time round, K. Whilst Special K™ is busy chasing dead ends, I hear step-brother Laurens got into a cab with a certain someone... It's New Years, and you know what that means...
As for Jessalyn? No explanation needed, I've got that absence covered for you in my own little post below.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Sigh. Kenzie just can't catch a break... belittled by Rosalia, ignored by Max, and ditched by so-called friend, Jessalyn. Not the best way to end the year, but look on the bright side, at least she's not the only lonely loser at this affair (I heard Mike Laurens made an appearance, as well. So, if you were hoping for a post-midnight kiss, I'm sure Mikey would do, I wouldn't recommend setting your hopes too high on Max – and, anyways, we sure are surprised you didn't just go home, Special K™, it's obvious you don't belong in the UES party scene).
Oh, my mistake, looks like Laurens might not be available for you this time round, K. Whilst Special K™ is busy chasing dead ends, I hear step-brother Laurens got into a cab with a certain someone... It's New Years, and you know what that means...
As for Jessalyn? No explanation needed, I've got that absence covered for you in my own little post below.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
spotted: a midnight kiss, xo
january
The year's scarcely turned and already the scandal has begun: Party Boy spotted locking lips with his ex-belle's BFF, Jessalyn McNamara, only to leave for the afterparty into the midst of the night with his new beloved; and a cowardly backing out from a kiss last minute. That's right, don't think I didn't notice those starry eyes at the countdown to twelve between de Luca and McNamara... And not to mention Queen A under the arms of none other than Bellamy Watson?! Surely no one could have missed the kiss, because a part of me fails to believe that #BadBoyBell would miss his chance to lock his lips around someone tonight.
...In the midst of all this scandal, someone it's hard to remember the new year isn't about what happened, it's about what's to come. But the past is always with us, just waiting to mess with the present.
And when it does, I'll be watching.
Happy New Year!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
...In the midst of all this scandal, someone it's hard to remember the new year isn't about what happened, it's about what's to come. But the past is always with us, just waiting to mess with the present.
And when it does, I'll be watching.
Happy New Year!
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
update three #newyears
DECEMBER
J. McNamara's been dancing on tabletops, and the amount of pictures that have passed through as submissions that have crashed the website just goes to show how much of everyone's favourite it-girl she really is. Now, in the interests of promoting peace in this time of passage into the new year (wooh!) I've decided I won't start a riot over who deserved to have whose picture of her posted, and I'll leave it at the knowledge of letting you know that someone's mother isn't going to be impressed by tonight's antics. I personally saw the wrath of Mrs McNamara's glare tonight, and I'm hoping it's not going to be landing on me anytime soon, because let me tell you one thing, momma McNamara isn't one to mess with.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
update d'eux #newyears
DECEMBER
For those of you well-versed in French, pardon the pun. While update deux is certainly here, you'll be happy to know it's about d'eux. Who's d'eux you ask, well, you'll just have to read on and see. Starting with the plain and utter boring, rumor has it that Kenzie appeared at Jane McNamara's office to beg an invitation to the party. Talk about desperate... But it seems that our dear little Plain Jane wasn't the only caught in desperation tonight. I hear our resident Party Boy's been desperate for attention from a particular girl who's caught his eye tonight, and something tells me it's neither of his former belles he's serenading tonight. You know what they say... Entre deux coeurs qui s’aiment, nul besoin de paroles.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
update #newyears
DECEMBER
The new year stands before us, like a chapter in a book, waiting to be written. I know it's been a while since my last post, but spare me the groans, I think I deserve a little partytime too. Speaking of the New Years soiree, Augustus and Emery's less significant twin, Amara, seem to really be hitting it off at the McNamara party, and my source reckons there's a future couple in our midst. Wait. Better question, do we even care? If there's another thing my source reckons, it's that unless they do the dirties in the hallway, their relationship will be just as bland as the next.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
your exclusive invitation to manhattan's hottest party of the year
DECEMBER
If there's the event to be seen at, it's the New Year's soiree, and, fortunately for me, everyone's invited – well, providing you're within the Upper East Side social circle, of course. But if lowbrow Mackenzie Amstel is up on the invitation list, there's no excuse for not finding your way in to Manhattan's hottest party of the year. Not only do you get the golden ticket to the inner circle, but as the soiree is just around the corner, I hear Max and Jessalyn's mother, Jane McNamara, is revealing something huge at their New Years' party... What could it be?
Location: The McNamara Estate
Dress code: Formal
Time: 9pm til late
Better be on your best behaviour, kiddies, the adults will be watching, and I know that I certainly will.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Location: The McNamara Estate
Dress code: Formal
Time: 9pm til late
Better be on your best behaviour, kiddies, the adults will be watching, and I know that I certainly will.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
published opinion
DECEMBER
In the words of the great Winston Churchill, there is no such thing as public opinion. There is only published opinion. And who better to bless you with published opinion than none other than moi? On the request of a devout follower of mine, I'm ready to set your New Years off with a bang as I reveal who I'm expecting will be gracing the front covers of Gossip Girl next semester...
For those of you not mentioned, don't you worry, after all, there's plenty of time for you to get your five seconds of fame.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
- Redhead: something tells me we'll be hearing a whole lot more about our mysterious redhead, and I'm making it my duty to get to the bottom of the new insider into the Upper East Side's social scene.
- Jezebel Luna and Nicholas Sterling: because we all know you can't put the genie back in the bottle.
- Alison Porter: no stranger to controversy, I'm expecting a whole lot more oomph from our favourite Upper East Side queen, and I foresee blood to be spilt.
- Jessalyn McNamara: Constance sweetheart J. has a whole lot more to her than her innocent looks, and I bet you my Michael Kors that she'll be making a recurring feature in the future for sure.
- Alyson Bell: there's no way you can escape unharmed when you've ventured into the lion's den, and I hear Alison Porter could be that very lion.
- Mason Oliver: it's no suprise that Mason features on this list when I hear he's been picking battles with Goliath. When you're aiming for the big guns, better make sure you're armed...
- Mackenzie Amstel: patience is bitter, but its love is sweet. Let's see what this semester brings to light for our resident Plain Jane.
For those of you not mentioned, don't you worry, after all, there's plenty of time for you to get your five seconds of fame.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
SPOTTED: TWO BELLS
DECEMBER
Spotted: two Bells living it up in the clubs of New York.
A was seen leaving the boys bathroom of a club a few minutes before #BadBoyBell, only to be spotted catching a cab to Bellamy's seconds later. Clearly they weren't finished with whatever they started in the toilet...
Better be careful, A, I hear you're not the first to fall victim to Bell's smooth tactics, though I guess it's better to love amiss than nothing to have loved.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
A was seen leaving the boys bathroom of a club a few minutes before #BadBoyBell, only to be spotted catching a cab to Bellamy's seconds later. Clearly they weren't finished with whatever they started in the toilet...
Better be careful, A, I hear you're not the first to fall victim to Bell's smooth tactics, though I guess it's better to love amiss than nothing to have loved.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
blackjack and consequences
DECEMBER
They say a picture paints a thousand words, but I think it's what's behind the lens that counts. I hear Alison's ex-beau was behind the camera on the night that she was captured heels-in-hand, and my bets are that someone's having a hard time moving on, with sources telling me that he's already playing his hand against his ex who's all but forgotten him by the looks of it now, given her recent fling with our all-time favourite Party Boy Sterling. I spy with my little eye someone by the name of Maya who has been paying quite a few visits to the family home of Mason Oliver, but don't get me wrong, I'm all set for this game of Blackjack. Deal a hand for me here, Andy, as I hear your family is well-versed in the likes of Jersey gamblers and low-class thieves, so much so, that only recently did I hear that someone's father did away with stealing two bottles of Prosecco from Whole Foods. What a perfect opportunity to drink to the start of a newfound war between Queen A and her ex-beau.
Who do you place your bets on, Andy?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Who do you place your bets on, Andy?
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
trouble in paradise
DECEMBER
The New Year is coming, and amongst all the glitz and glamour of the cocktail parties, it appears there's trouble in BFF paradise between J and J again. A little birdie told me that Jezebel Luna, who everyone knows isn't at all fond of drama, isn't at all happy with her BFF - and the fact that, the people Jessalyn is making enemies with are Jezebel's friends, isn't making anything better. Jessalyn herself apparently feels like Jezebel should be on her side and defend her... but would you really defend someone who has a crush on your ex-beau? Nothing says January like a brand new cold war, but it feels as though Jezebel herself is in for a cold awakening, because you can't fight two battles at once. That's right, I heard her estranged father's not doing too well behind bars following a certain commotion which left him black-eyed, bloodied, and stuck to an IV in intensive care.
...Seems like someone's going to miss out on all the holiday cheer.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
...Seems like someone's going to miss out on all the holiday cheer.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Spotted: Alison porter
DECEMBER
One of my many sources, Jane Doe, sends us this:
Spotted leaving the bedroom of Nicholas Sterling, with her hair ruffled and shoes in hand. Late night booty call??
Queen A and Party Boy sure seemed to move on fast.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Spotted leaving the bedroom of Nicholas Sterling, with her hair ruffled and shoes in hand. Late night booty call??
Queen A and Party Boy sure seemed to move on fast.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
redhead
DECEMBER
My source alleges that Mackenzie shivers when she sees Nick, and Jordan stares when she sees Max, which is all news enough because we all know #Jax isn't happening any time soon, and #MacNick just sounds like a McDonalds burger (gross!). Now I know that's all news of the past to you, but hey do I have some tempting gossip. Ever heard of Edison Montgomery? I heard he was playing around with a redhead. I don't know about you, but I know a few redheads around... Alison Porter... Amber Fantasia... It'd be a shame if it was dear Ali because she's like a ticking timebomb, no wonder her and M are a thing of the past. And Amber? Don't even get me started on her, she's probably on her fifth lap around on her 'to do' list, and I'm not talking manis and pedis.
Speaking of the new, did I hear that Constance is getting a new transfer? Is it a coincidence that at the same time that Montgomery is seen playing around with a redhead, none other than a pretty little redhead was seen signing New Student Forms? My sources swear to the fact that she seems a bit too familiar, but all that aside, I'm sure I'll have a great time making her feel at home in our school.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
Speaking of the new, did I hear that Constance is getting a new transfer? Is it a coincidence that at the same time that Montgomery is seen playing around with a redhead, none other than a pretty little redhead was seen signing New Student Forms? My sources swear to the fact that she seems a bit too familiar, but all that aside, I'm sure I'll have a great time making her feel at home in our school.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
In with the new
DECEMBER
On the special request of a loyal follower, it's in with the new this year, and I smell trouble brewing for a certain McNamara as I hear that she has a huge crush on Party Boy next door. They've apparently been spending some time together, on account of her brother's friendship with him but, my, do I feel so bad for her, because it emerges that one of her oldest friends, Mackenzie Amstel, apparently totally has the hots for him, too! Bring in Jezebel Luna and I sense a brewing storm (but I'm totes team #jeznick)
...Didn't no one tell you? Be careful what you wish for, dear Jessalyn, because Gossip Girl doesn't like to disappoint.
And while we're on the subject of the McNamaras, it reminds me of a rather persistent submission I got a while back surrounding Jordan and Max, who seem to be breaking apart. "#Jax were so cute together when they were young." "Their friendship seems a little off..." Don't kid me, I mean, Jordan who? I'm not surprised Max hasn't set a mile in her direction considering I'm still debating over her linguistic abilities (but seriously, has anyone actually ever heard her talk?) But I'll take some sympathy for her this once seeing as she obviously doesn't have the ability to voice her concerns, so here goes:
Shout out to Ms Voiceless who's in need of some it-boy attention.
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
...Didn't no one tell you? Be careful what you wish for, dear Jessalyn, because Gossip Girl doesn't like to disappoint.
And while we're on the subject of the McNamaras, it reminds me of a rather persistent submission I got a while back surrounding Jordan and Max, who seem to be breaking apart. "#Jax were so cute together when they were young." "Their friendship seems a little off..." Don't kid me, I mean, Jordan who? I'm not surprised Max hasn't set a mile in her direction considering I'm still debating over her linguistic abilities (but seriously, has anyone actually ever heard her talk?) But I'll take some sympathy for her this once seeing as she obviously doesn't have the ability to voice her concerns, so here goes:
Shout out to Ms Voiceless who's in need of some it-boy attention.
That's all for now.
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
the gift of insight
DECEMBER
Amidst all the eggnog of the holiday season and tinsel that sparkles shinier than your precious Cartiers, one should always take time to make sure we look at past mistakes and make sure we don't repeat them again. A little birdie did the pleasure of telling me a little something that I sure would like to share with you - oh, aren't I the gift that keeps on giving?
My first gift to you comes with a little insight into the lives of our beloved Hanning siblings. They did seem to have it all, didn't they? Sebastian graduating first in his class, marrying his high school sweetheart... Awwh, it's an all American rom-com gag fest come to life, if you ask me. Well, I've heard him and Madison are having a few too many problems, and sources say they saw a pretty little blondie locking lips with him outside the New York Time's Office. And let's not even get on the topic of Taylor Hanning. That girl went from the bottom of Manhattan's Elite to being the elite, as she travels around the world singing her little heart out to crowds of adoring fans. Who would have ever thought? I mean, I guess it gives you a leg up in the world when you're screwing both Elsworth successors. I guess she has to wait and find out who's gonna get the money before choosing her beau for certain, but my bets are on Elsworth brother A with the insight I'm about to give you next.
Jace Prince. Used-to-be hottest Constance Bad Boy. Seems a little too whipped if you ask me, and I don't mean by his girlfriend Naomi Robins. No, I do believe he was having a little too much fun on his guy's trip with the one and only Gordan Elsworth, as they got in a little trouble. Yes, I did find a little arrest charge for public indecency from both of them as they were found wandering naked in the streets of San Francisco. So much for Bergdorf's across the street...
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
My first gift to you comes with a little insight into the lives of our beloved Hanning siblings. They did seem to have it all, didn't they? Sebastian graduating first in his class, marrying his high school sweetheart... Awwh, it's an all American rom-com gag fest come to life, if you ask me. Well, I've heard him and Madison are having a few too many problems, and sources say they saw a pretty little blondie locking lips with him outside the New York Time's Office. And let's not even get on the topic of Taylor Hanning. That girl went from the bottom of Manhattan's Elite to being the elite, as she travels around the world singing her little heart out to crowds of adoring fans. Who would have ever thought? I mean, I guess it gives you a leg up in the world when you're screwing both Elsworth successors. I guess she has to wait and find out who's gonna get the money before choosing her beau for certain, but my bets are on Elsworth brother A with the insight I'm about to give you next.
Jace Prince. Used-to-be hottest Constance Bad Boy. Seems a little too whipped if you ask me, and I don't mean by his girlfriend Naomi Robins. No, I do believe he was having a little too much fun on his guy's trip with the one and only Gordan Elsworth, as they got in a little trouble. Yes, I did find a little arrest charge for public indecency from both of them as they were found wandering naked in the streets of San Francisco. So much for Bergdorf's across the street...
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
NEW YEAR NEW ME
January
Gossip Girl here, your one and only source into the scandalous lives of Manhattan’s Elite. If there's one thing I don't love more than gossip, it's winter in the Upper East Side. You've got your Christmas celebrations, then your New Year's celebrations, and soon in no time you're braving the cold in your three-inch Christian Louboutins for the sake of flaunting your privileges in the streets of New York. And New Year's resolutions are always a big one- this year I'm taking a step forward with my resolution.
New Year New Me, and this year I promise to be even bigger and better than ever.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
New Year New Me, and this year I promise to be even bigger and better than ever.
You know you love me,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl